Here I Am, Lord

Here I am Lord, Is it I Lord?
I have heard You calling in the night.
I will go Lord, if You lead me.
I will hold Your people in my heart.

Here I Am, Lord (Hymn)

One of my favorite hymns is Here I Am, Lord. It is lilting, uplifting, and comforting. It talks about God protecting his people and his love for mankind.

This hymn has its beginnings from Abraham, The Book of Genesis to be precise. Abraham is first met in Genesis 12, when God convinces Abraham to leave his native land with the promise of making him into a great nation.

Abraham is tested by God, but each time God calls him, he replies "Here I am Lord, willing and able." How wonderful that sounds, to be able to speak that phrase and mean it with all of your heart. I often think to myself, what would happen if I gave everything, literally everything, to God? 

Technically, I already have. I believe in God, I believe in God's will, yet I have not reached the point of 100% trust in the Lord. I took a plunge and applied to an internship that will take me across the Atlantic, to a country where the native language is not English. Yet, I still am nervous. I still am concerned about the ability to survive in France for seven months. I know I am blessed, yet I can't seem to get the doubt out of my head.

"No, O people, the Lord has told you what is good,
      and this is what he requires of you:
   to do what is right, to love mercy,
      and to walk humbly with your God."

 Micah 6:8

As much as I want to continue to doubt, I know I have to continue my struggle to trust completely in Him.

"Daily, our faithfulness will be tested." Reverend Ede Plavonich
 

"God does not intend to leave us where we are. By no means is he finished with us." Reverend Ede Plavonich

Busy Schedules

O God, in the course of this busy life, give us times of
refreshment and peace; and grant that we may so use our
leisure to rebuild our bodies and renew our minds, that our
spirits may be opened to the goodness of your creation;
through Jesus Christ our Lord.  

Amen.

(A Prayer for the Good Use of Leisure)
 

Doubts

"I cried out, I am slipping! but your unfailing love supported me, O Lord. When doubts filled my mind, your comfort gave me renewed hope and cheer."
Psalm 94:18-19

Recently, my cousin Drew lost three of his friends in a car accident on their way back from youth group on a Sunday night. They were 16. I must ask you all for something today, your prayers. He needs them, and so do the families of the boys.

My cousin and his friends are strong in their faith. They go to church, they have loving and supportive families and are all around wonderful guys. But something happened, and God needed them to be with him. As hard as it is for me to understand, I accept that. I accept the fact that God has a plan for all of us and that his plan is true and holy and good. His plan has a reason. I never have been able to understand death, human death really. For in God we do not die, and we are survived by our friends, our families, and the memories that we have left behind. We touch people's lives in ways we cannot imagine, and we will never die for them.

I know this to be true because I still hear stories about my great-great-great Uncle Sambo. In family, your legend lives on in facial features and similarities.

Death is frightening, it is sad, it causes us to doubt our faith and to doubt God. Instead, we should be putting our trust into him, relying on him and others while we are lying at the bottom wondering why it had to be them, why them and why now.

God will comfort us, through memories, friends, songs, movies, television, magazines, books. God will steer us towards happiness.

That is my belief.

I pray that you all are having a blessed day.